I am not perfect, and I find that information a bit disconcerting.  People who are not Christians like to condemn Christians for their imperfections and inconsistencies and I would prefer not having any evidence in my life to support their case—but I am not to that point yet.  I find that I don’t have answers to all the questions, I get impatient when I would rather give the impression of a kindly, patient grandma, and I will not put Christian bumper stickers on my car for all the obvious reasons—I am not always a totally reasonable driver (though it is more often other people who are the offenders, not me!).

I would like my life to be like a sailboat with colorful sails on a lake with deep blue waters, steady, gentle winds and the sun shining brilliantly.  More often than not, I feel like I am in a rickety rowboat, no land in sight, harsh winds and high waves.

However, life is not about sailing through—perhaps that works for some people, but not most.  The precious fact is that for those of us who are Christians, we have a sleeping Savior in our boats.  Sleeping?  I don’t think so.  Resting, –definitely!  Implicit in the command to go to the other side is the promise that we will get there.  He is not worried about the storms; we do not need to be either!

That being said, I had some moments lately when I hit my “faith wall”.  There has been a “status change” regarding my finances, and things that could go wrong in the apartment were going wrong.  The waves were tossing me and my arms were weak from rowing and getting nowhere!  On top of that, my human nature was getting exposed in some rather annoying ways—it took me back to the days when depression was how I was doing even though “fine” was my answer.

I pouted for about a day and a half, grumping around a bit like my 2-year-old granddaughter.  I am getting smarter nowadays, though.  I’m not spending near as much, if any, time trying to get my emotions rearranged and making false faith confessions that cause my heart and my mind to scream at me “LIAR!”  Rather, I have learned that my best response is to go to the Source, to the One who sees my heart and sees through my hypocrisy and tell him my fears, my “oh ye of little faith” moments, and confess that I just do not have what it takes to be good enough, nor adequate faith to get Him to do what I want or need Him to do for me.

The beauty and simplicity of the gospel touches every area of our lives, though, especially those “I just don’t seem to have enough faith moments”—it is in those very weak times when, if we will let Him, God will be our strength.  It starts with honesty on our part—if we confess our unbelief to Him, He will forgive us and wash away our unbelief.  Abraham is best known for being the father of faith, but it was not instantaneous (which you will notice if you read his story).  It is amazing that his mistakes and failures are not recorded in the New Testament, but God’s final assessment of his life is, no distrust made him waver concerning the promise of God, but he grew strong in his faith as he gave glory to God, fully convinced that God was able to do what he had promised (Romans 4:20, 21).

Faith grows—that’s the bottom line.  The promises of God, recorded in the Bible, are not clouds, puffy and unsubstantial; rather, they are the facts we can build our lives upon, as solid as bedrock—not like sand that shifts with the wind and the waves.  There are so many reasons to give glory to God!  Beginning with salvation, there is no area of our lives where we need to live outside of God’s amazing covering and provision.

The Holy Spirit gently whispered to me, “You are letting these minor things derail your life and relationship to Me?  What will happen when the big tests come, if you stand trial for your faith?”   He also gave me a word for who Jesus wants to be for me in this situation—provision.

The truth about faith is that it is dynamic, not static.  One does not “get saved” and stay there.  Oh, no!  God has much better stuff for us—victories, blessings, emotional restoration, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, all of the goodies wrapped up in the fruit and gifts of the Holy Spirit, they all belong to us through faith, as we grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ—and give Him glory!