I’ve listened to and been a part of several discussions lately about the Holy Spirit and the effect He has in the lives of born-again believers in Jesus.  One such discussion was with several sisters in Christ during a women’s conference held at a local church.

There were several of us bigger women sitting around a table discussing our frustration with food and particularly the struggles we have managing our eating habits—there was also one of those “tiny little things” sitting with us, and she expressed the same frustration.  I’ve sat in these types of discussions before and been upset and frustrated when small women have commiserated with us larger women, but I’ve traveled around enough mountains in the desert by now to know that appearances communicate very little about a person’s heart or their struggles, and that inward battles are rarely obvious or what we expect them to be.

 I also recognize that not only non-believers, but also Christians (even though scripture reminds us in 1 Samuel 16:7, “For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart”) tend to judge people by outward appearances and no matter who we are, we are often affected by the opinions of the culture, and sadly, by our church community—unless we are continually having our minds transformed by the Holy Spirit and the Word of God.

I’ve wrestled before the Lord, knowing that I have prayed to be filled with the Holy Spirit, and there is nothing I can do to receive the Spirit— “Let me ask you only this: Did you receive the Spirit by works of the law or by hearing with faith? …Does he who supplies the Spirit to you and works miracles among you do so by works of the law, or by hearing with faith—just as Abraham ‘believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness’?  Know then that it is those of faith who are the sons of Abraham.” (Galatians 3:2-3, 5-7)

Here’s the dilemma some of us face—having prayed to be filled with the Holy Spirit and recognizing that it is by faith that we receive His power, His gifting, and His fruit; yet not seeing the fruit of self-control showing up in our lives the way we think it should, it is easy to come “under the cloud” of thinking that we’re not working hard enough at this self-control thing and, either we are failing the Holy Spirit, or He is failing us. …and God being a God who cannot fail, we slip into a position of condemnation instead of freedom in Jesus.

Our mistake, though, is determining what it looks like to be a Spirit-filled Christian based on outward appearance instead of on the inside.  The apostle Paul so eloquently reminds us, “So we do not lose heart.  Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.  For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen.  For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” (2 Corinthians 4:16-18)

It is interesting, though, how easy it is to get caught up in this one dimension of the Holy Spirit’s character and forget about the other eight named fruit or evidences of His presence.  I tell you, when naming the fruit of the Spirit, I can, with confidence name, LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE…  and then sort of mumble whatever I can remember of kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness; and then coming back firmly with SELF-CONTROL. (Galatians 6:22-23)

Our mistake is thinking that these are characteristics that we do instead of what the Holy Spirit does in us when we accept Jesus as our Savior and Redeemer.  “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.  The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17)

I’ve also noticed something interesting about this listing of the fruit of the Spirit; the first three are entwined and reflect our relationship with God.  For instance:

“We have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us, GOD IS LOVE, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.” (1 John 4:16)

“You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fulness of JOY; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” (Psalm 16:11) …and “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you.  Abide in my love.  If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in His love.  These things I have spoken to you, that my JOY may be in you, and that your JOY may be full.  This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.” (John 15:9-12)

“PEACE I leave with you; MY PEACE I give to you.  Not as the world gives do I give to you.  Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” (John 14:27)

Patience is something that we learn through our relationship with God, and is an attribute that we get to show to others:

“…As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with PATIENCE.” (Luke 8:15) …and, “…hope that is seen is not hope.  For who hopes for what he sees?  But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with PATIENCE.” (Romans 8:24, 25)

God’s patience towards us: “The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost.  But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display His perfect PATIENCE as an example to those who were to believe in Him for eternal life.” (1 Timothy 1:16-17)

And in our relationships with others – notice that patience is often included with other fruit of the Spirit:

“I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with al humility and GENTLENESS, with PATIENCE, bearing with one another in LOVE, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of PEACE.” (Ephesians 4:1-3)

“Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and compassionate hearts, KINDNESS, humility, meekness, and PATIENCE, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.  And above all these put on LOVE, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.  And let the PEACE of Christ rule in your hearts….” (Colossians 3:12-15)

Kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and gentleness are gracious qualities of God and they are to be defining characteristics in our lives, too.

And that leaves us with self-control.  I find the “self” part interesting—where the other fruit of the Spirit are “other” focused, this final fruit in the list of Holy Spirit characteristics is “self” focused.  Here are what some scriptures say about self-control:

“But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty.  For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.” (2 Timothy 3:1-5)

What is so striking to me about the depravity of evil described in these verses is that it is cloaked in an appearance of godliness.

“…God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” (2 Timothy 1:7)

“For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love.  For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.” (2 Peter 1:5-8)

I think Holy Spirit ignited self-control energizes the other spiritual fruit in our lives, and as we grow in the grace and knowledge of Jesus Christ, they also grow. 

The reason I’m writing about this right now, besides my own food struggles, I have heard the anguished admissions of godly people, because of their battles with food and eating disorders, wondering about the presence, power, and fruit of the spirit at work in their lives—while Holy Spirit dynamics are so obviously at work through them.

At the same time, I have heard professing Christians ridicule and curse people, particularly in this adversarial political climate, and willing them to fiery destruction in hell. 

…and I’ve also heard people that I diametrically disagree with or have observed situations that are not biblically supported—and felt the calming and restraining presence of the Holy Spirit in my life to modify my responses in those circumstances.

My concern, my hope, and my prayer is that, as believers in Jesus Christ and members of His body—living in the midst of a culture antagonistic to the gospel, often hostile to Christians, and increasingly so—we would remember to be filled with God’s Spirit, to be filled with His presence, listening to His voice, and demonstrating Holy Spirit fruitfulness throughout our lives.