Circumstances frequently bring my thoughts back to the verse in 2^nd Timothy that declares, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind” (1:7 NKJV).  Interestingly, various Bible translations present slightly different interpretations of that verse; for instance, the ESV states, “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.”

As easy as it may be to focus on what may appear to be a discrepancy between these translations, I am more inclined to focus on the similarities.  In speaking through Paul, the Holy Spirit identifies significant characteristics of His personality and contrasts them with an aspect of the demonic realm—a Spirit of power and love and a sound mind (or self-control) versus a spirit of fear.  In fact, in moments of fear, self-control characterizes a sound mind—because in the midst of troubling circumstances, it is necessary that we “take every thought captive to obey Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:3-6).

So, with all that happened in the past month with my daughter’s accident, my son travelling back from Afghanistan, his wife making a twelve-hour drive to help me out with some of the details that needed attention, my other son flying back to Virginia with my granddaughter to give my daughter some time to heal before having the energy of a 4-year old bouncing around her, and his wife flying to San Diego and back to Virginia in one day to bring Eugenie back…  I cannot begin to tell you how emotionally vulnerable I felt.  Knowing that anything could happen as my family members were travelling.

I know the Bible; I know the scriptures that instruct me to cast my cares on Jesus, because He cares for me (1 Peter 5:7), to be anxious for nothing, instead pray (Philippians 4:6), and I treasure Jesus’ promise that whatever things I ask in prayer, believing, I will receive (Matthew 21:22).  Yet there is this little corner cupboard in my heart where fear lurks, and whether one considers it a stronghold or a lack of faith, there is a pressure point where, if a spirit of fear pushes hard enough I respond.

I was four, just a few months older than Eugenie is right now, and my life was overwhelmed with illness, a hospital bed, and a dying mother.  I didn’t really have the opportunity to grieve until much later in my life, though I thought I worked through the pain and abandonment left over from my small child’s heart.  However this past month, with so much happening at one time, my inability to control life or circumstances brought to surface a sense of insecurity that whispered that life is unreliable—God is unreliable because hurtful, bad things still happen, and my heart felt as delicate as fine china.

I know all the right answers—that evil is still present in this world and until Jesus returns, pain is inevitable.  Yet there are these nagging little “what ifs?” that seem to pop up when life becomes unpredictable or seems out of my control.

When I was considering what to write in this post, initially I was going to title it “Confronting Demons” but I was a bit concerned those words might communicate something that I did not intend.  However, Christian or not, many people refer to “demons”, particularly from their pasts, that seem to harass them at different times and in various circumstances of their lives.  There are spots of vulnerability in our hearts where the enemy knows how to exert pressure in ways that can either establish a demonic stronghold or, by surrendering our weaknesses to God through prayer and confession, He can create a fortress of faith.  …and faith is important because, “without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him” (Hebrews 11:6).  “And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith” (1 John 5:4).

A spirit of fear is not the only enemy many experience circling their hearts, looking for a place to land.  The Bible speaks of others, such as a spirit of jealousy (Numbers 5:14), a haughty spirit (Proverbs 16:18), a spirit of heaviness (Isaiah 61:3), a spirit of harlotry (Hosea 4:12), a spirit of infirmity (Luke 13:17), a spirit of divination (Acts 16:16), a spirit of bondage (Romans 8:15), a spirit of stupor (Romans 11:8), the spirit of the world (1 Corinthians 2:12), the spirit of the antichrist (1 John 4:3), and a spirit of error (1 John 4:6)—to name a few.

As well equipped warriors, we have every tactical advantage over the enemy:  “For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:4, 5)—Ephesians 6 lists a number of those weapons available to us.  We also can receive encouragement from the fact that “He who is in [us] is greater than he who is in the world” (1 John 4:4).

This is my prayer as I assess my life and all that is going on in the world around us:

O Father God, grant me, grant my children and their families, and grant your people wisdom and discernment to recognize the ploys that Satan and his cohorts use to side-track us from pure devotion to you.  Cleanse our hearts and our minds from the spirits of this world and every spirit of error; create ever-increasing hunger in our hearts for your Word and truth.  Pour your Spirit and grace into our hearts and equip us for battle, I pray.  Remind your children that evidence of faith is not so much in the things we possess or in what we give; instead, it is about in whom we hope, and our willingness to worship you when clouds obscure the sun.  In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.